Something that has been on my mind a lot lately has been grieve and grieving. We all experience grieve in our everyday lives, it doesn’t necessarily been connected to a death of a loved one, but simply relate to loss. It could be the grieve that you feel when losing a friend due to a falling out or the grieve that comes from the loss of a driver's license and the hence perceived freedom and independence.

I have done a bit of research into grieving and came across numerous articles, how-to guides and the always present “stages of grieving” (more on that later). Throughout my research, it has come apparent that there can’t be a guide or a “how to” on this topic, as we are all different, and all our circumstances are different. However, there are a lot of tips that may be able to help.

One aspect of grieve that stood out to me was on caregivers. Caregivers are constantly exposed to grieve as they continually experience losses with the person in their care. This could be a loss of independence, memory, ability or personality. This type of loss may even be experienced on a day to day basis. While this may sound very dim, there are also many rewarding and positive emotions that you will feel from being a caregiver.

However, one aspect that I think is key to coping with loss is to learn to be vulnerable and authentic and to acknowledge the emotions that you are feeling. You may find it helpful to talk to someone who understands your situation or is in a similar situation; this can be done by finding a local support group or even a virtual one. Further don’t be afraid to cry, if you are feeling sad and need to cry, just do it. There is nothing wrong with it, and it is in significant emotional release when experiencing grief or pain. There is no timeframe for your pain, and you may find tears coming and going for years.

However, some recent studies (Journal of Personality and Social Psychology) have shown that the worst of grief is usually over within about six months. This research doesn’t try to say that you will stop thinking, caring or missing a loved one, but that your life will return to “normal” functioning. “It's hard to tell what makes people resilient. "Personality probably predicts only about 10% of resilience, having money helps, having social support helps, having minimal sources of other stress helps, but no one thing is a big predictor." What we do know is that while loss is forever, acute grief is not”. (Bonanno Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 2002)

If you have been looking into coping with grief you most probably have come across the five stages of grief. They are outlined to be denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. The stages have been taken out of their original context and been embedded into our culture in an incorrect way. Originally they were written in 1969 by Elisabeth Kuebler-Ross in relations to one facing their death and how to cope and deal with the emotions associated. You can find out more information about this here